More Than Words: Getting to the Heart of User Pain Points

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Getting users to express their pain points is more than just asking questions—it’s about observing what they don’t say.

When I started my first user interview session as part of a product team, I thought I was ready. I had my list of questions, my bullet points, and my confidence that I’d walk away with exactly what I needed to design a solution. Spoiler alert: I was wrong.

Unpredictability of Real Users

No matter how many articles or best-practice guides you read, nothing quite prepares you for the sheer unpredictability of real users. You’ll have a carefully structured interview, and then—three minutes in—you realize the most valuable insights are coming from what they aren’t saying.

“I still remember one teacher who calmly told me, ‘It’s working fine,’ while her eyes darted to the side, clearly frustrated. That moment taught me that the real pain points are often hidden between the lines.”

The Value of Body Language

You see, there’s a big difference between what users say and what they feel. And when you can see them—watching how they hesitate, frown, or light up when discussing their problems—you realize that body language is the real data.

During a project, I shifted from surveys to video interviews, and everything changed. It’s in those subtle, unspoken moments where users express their true frustrations and pain points.

Stop Asking for Solutions, Start Watching for Pain

Humans are great at articulating their needs, but not always at articulating solutions. As I learned, users don’t always know what solution they want, and it’s not their job to know. It’s ours.

What they are good at is showing their pain. Their struggles. When I stopped asking for solutions and started paying attention to the underlying frustrations, I began to find the real insights.

The Magic is in the Reactions

That’s when I realized: the value of user interviews isn’t in the answers to your questions. It’s in their reactions—the raised eyebrow, the slight hesitation, the smile that comes when they talk about what actually works. Those are the moments that matter.

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